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Coping with being self-employed

Updated: Feb 25, 2021

When I made the decision as a self-employed business owner to temporarily close my therapy room door due to Covid-19 even knowing my income would cease overnight, I surprised myself when I didn't have some sort of emotional meltdown. In the past I most certainly would! So, why didn't I?

I've learnt so many lessons whilst being in business and I now have this calm, inner faith. I’m not a religious person but I truly believe there is something out there in the Universe that helps, teaches and navigates us along the path that has been mapped out for us. You may think I'm deluded but believe me I’ve not always been like this. Not at all! In fact quite the opposite, 'a born worrier' was one of my titles for far too long, so what changed?

Life, experiences, disappointments of mammoth quantities and some very hard knocks, some so severe I wanted to stay down but I suppose I’ve always had an inner strength (very deeply hidden at times), been showered with love and have had plenty of support.

My first difficulty was following the birth of my now, gorgeous 28-year-old son, I had a complete breakdown and was diagnosed with Post Natal Depression, my world truly collapsed around me in more ways than one. I couldn't cope with life, PND was one thing and work was another!

At that time I was in a business partnership with a family member, we co-owned a Private Day Nursery. Going into business with someone you know can be challenging, but for us both it was a great time, for the first couple of years anyway. It all turned very sour at the most difficult time in my life and although I should have taken legal action. I walked away, I was already broken and had not one ounce of fight left in me!

Skip forward to 2008, my husband & I had our own business, we were retailers of Hot Tubs.

A mad idea he’d had, but equally a brilliant one too. We hit the ground running, superseded our business plan in the first year with sheer determination and dedication, we were doing well.Then along came the Credit Crunch!

Who was buying expensive hot tubs…yup you’re right, no-one!

We closed our doors on the same day Woolworths did and bizarrely I took some comfort from that, yet my mental health took another nose dive. With time I dusted myself off and returned to being employed and that suited me perfectly. But I'd loved being in business, slightly crazy but if you're a business owner you'll get me, I'm sure.

So for my next venture I decided this business was going to be mine and mine alone (lesson #1), providing a service with very little overheads (lesson #2), my tools would be my hands (lesson #3). I love people , I'm sensitive to others, offer reassurance, listen, nurture and like to make a difference to how someone feels, so my new direction was as a ‘Holistic Therapist.'

Once I qualified as a Reflexologist and became a Reiki Practitioner, R&R Therapy was born.

I’d found my niche; it ticks every single one of my boxes. It’s mine, its service based & I'm in my element!

As with everything in life, it's not been easy, there have been other challenges throwing me off course and away from physically working. The first disruption resulted in a broken ankle and 9 weeks off work! I used this time to research, read and practice what I preach, I lived a quiet life, with little overheads and when I finally returned to work, all but one of my clients came back! So onwards and upwards was my direction with huge gratitude to the loyalty of my clients.

Then Christmas 2017 disaster struck again, this time severing three tendons in my right hand. Not good!! This time it was a 12-week healing process, eventually with almost normal usage I returned to work, my clients had waited for me…again. I love them all!

There have been so many obstructions over the last 30 years and for much of that time I saw it as a negative, something to recover from and be damaged by yet now I have a completely different view, I have come to realise that whatever life has thrown at me, I’ve learnt from it, I’ve become stronger, more resilient, even when my path has changed direction in ways I’d never, never imagined but I am a much happier, relaxed person and no longer a far thats been my lesson in go with the flow and not fight. That saying 'As one door closes, another opens' is very true!

When these life events happen, we have absolutely no control over them, we can only do our very best to muddle through, remember to breathe and believe. It may lead to the start of something completely new, letting go of something that has been your passion, your dream, where there will have been blood, sweat and tears is not easy! Finances will be a massive worry and very stressful, you'll lose sleep but please, please, hang on in there, stay safe and talk, talk and talk some more because what I do know is that..

It will be OK in the end, if it’s not OK it’s not the end!

Best Wishes


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